Ghosts or ancestral spirits have been central to Chinese spiritual life for centuries. -Mulder · Hell Money

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Remember When

10/2004 Tre

thumbnail I created this XF collage towards the end of Season 7. At the time I needed to get back to my roots. Why was I watching this show? It was so obviously not going anywhere near where I wanted it to lead. Why was I investing so much time and thought into these characters? I was so tremendously pissed at them for any number of reasons. Why was I still a shipper? Relationship? Doesn't it need to exist to even be a shipper? Because of the plot? Baby, Chris Carter had deviated from that a long time ago.

This collage was a representation of why I started watching The X-Files. It wasn't about the ship because in 1993 that wasn't a word to me. It wasn't about the aliens or Mulder finding Samantha, or Scully getting pregnant, and The Lone Gunmen had still yet to make an appearance. I started watching because this was a Prime Time show about the PARANORMAL. And it wasn't some ABC Saturday Night Special on Ghosts and the Unexplained. This was a real show about paranormal events. They were dealing with all these creepy-crawlies that had kept me awake in the dark for years. I have ever been a fan of the paranormal and I thought this show is for me!

The first episode I watched was Squeeze - S1X03. I was 23 years old and I was enthralled. I was so excited and desperately hoping for an episode where Mulder looked for evidence of Bigfoot. So the next week I watched, and the next, and the next...and before the first season was done I was hooked, on the mythology, the relationship, and Mulder. Because by then, Mulder was what it was all about. Not Duchovny. But Mulder. That flawed, self-centered, tragic, paranoid, incredibly intelligent, beautiful man. I spent 9 years watching this show (and man) and only missed two episodes in all that time, once when I was leaving my ex-husband, and once when some jerk had cut the cable lines to my house. As the internet became available I discovered fan fiction and later the fan art. My life began to whirl around a fandom and before I knew it, it was over. Season 9 was done and we were all left standing, bereft, looking at each other with our Mulder action figures clutched in our frustrated hands.

So in Season 7 when things were going nowhere and they STILL hadn't done an episode about Bigfoot, I decided to get back to The Point. And The Point was Mulder and the Paranormal. Included in this are three wonderful images of David, a made up letter to Mulder, and some of the scariest and most fascinating events I've ever read about. They include: Area 51 keep out signs; Jacko, the only known living captive of what was believed to be a bigfoot; the Patterson film of bigfoot, a drawing of a spectre from the former artbell.com; newspaper headlines; the Brown Lady of Raynham Hall, El Chupacabre, the photo of the SS Watertown ghosts; the Jersey Devil; the Loch Ness Monster; "Andy" the only captured alien ever taken alive; and finally, a Shadowman.

Images were brought together by simple blending. Overlaying, erasing, and cropping together for a nice messy mixture of scariness. And to top it off, I mispelled Mayhem! I was so pissed that I have since left it there, forever mispelled, as a reminder that you can never be too careful. I could easily remove it now, but I like the message. And this is my memory, not just the art, but the show, the FBI man, and what it all meant to me.